A (sort of) review of Superstar

The first time I saw Jesus Christ Superstar, I was appalled at the way that Jesus was being depicted. My religious upbringing focused on a narrow view of Jesus as someone who was out to punish us for minor offenses and had no room for any other interpretation. I have learned so much since then.

I know how that there are various ways to tell and to understand the story, and if a rock-n-roll version is what catches someone’s attention, then so be it. I have had so many good conversations on what the Bible says (and what it doesn’t) with some very intelligent people who have opened my eyes to the fact that I had been seeing a white-washed version of Jesus. You know, the version that depicts Jesus as a European man? I now even know where that likeness stems from. (Hint: google Cesare Borgia.)

I don’t know when my mindset changed. I just know it has. (Hell, even Sir Andrew Loyd Webber didn’t like the film version, so I am in good company.) I have learned to have a love for all things Broadway. When that first chord of “Superstar” played I got chills. It’s like that when I hear “Phantom,” too. When Superstar premiered, having a black lead was seen as blasphemous, yet Jesus was a man born in a middle Eastern country that more likely has brown skinned people than light skinned ones.

Funny thing...I have seen The Ten Commandments many times and I never thought twice about Anne Baxter playing Nefertiri until I watched it last night. For that fact, Charleston Heston as Moses, Liz Taylor as Cleopatra....I guess it’s just what we have done. But now with the diverse cast of Hamilton....I mean, George Washington, Aaron Burr, Thomas Jefferson were all European men and they are all being played by POC. For a while, I only thought having a diverse cast was okay only when the characters were fictional. Not any more...so I guess the cast of Ten Commandments should get a pass, too.

Anyway, Superstar was AMAZING!!  If you missed it, you missed a good one. Put aside your long-held beliefs and give it a chance if you haven’t before. Open your eyes and I know you will love it!

Yep! You guessed it!

I’m seeing this so often right now that I just have to say something. Yes, this is going to be a GRAMMAR RANT!!!

Let me first give you some examples of what I’m seeing. This was just on Twitter:

“I’m so glad the members of @SoulTreeNation could join @JenniL_KVUE @JasonM_KVUE and I on Daybreak this morning. This talented group of young musicians will pay tribute to band member Draylen Mason who was killed in the #AustinBombings at the @UrbanMusicFest today.”

You might wonder what exactly is wrong here. Well, it’s the use of “I” in this tweet that is incorrect. How do I know? Take out the sentence and look at it like this: would you say “I’m glad they joined I this morning,” or would you say “I’m glad they joined me this morning”?

It’s easy! So why is it so hard????

So when is “I” appropriate? Here’s an example I found:

a. Jenny and me/I (?) joined the chess club.
b. Jill took Justin and me/I (?) to the shop. 

In sentence a), Jenny and me/I are the subjects of the verb joined. Therefore, the subject pronoun, I, is considered correct. You will certainly hear native speakers say, “Jenny and me,” and it may be acceptable in spoken English, but most traditional grammarians and English teachers will disapprove. Don’t use it in writing. 

The opposite is true for sentence b), which is the original example from above. Justin and me/I are the objects of took. Therefore me is considered correct by most grammarians and teachers, although you will hear people say, “Justin and I.” Again, don't use it in writing.

All you have to do is break the sentence apart ant if it sounds right, then it’s right. Period.

Time management

Today at work, we had a training class on time and information management. The man who presented the class was a successful time management consultant who also previously worked in the hotel industry. He made some really good points so I thought I would share a couple with you.

One thing he touched on is how we don’t end our work day at the end of each day. Instead, we take things home with us that keep up awake at night which causes all kinds of other problems. One tip he gave us was to keep a daily diary that includes a to-do list. The to-do list is fluid and if everything doesn’t get finished that day, it’s okay. It can be finished tomorrow. Maybe it’s not as important as we may think it is, so he suggested not stressing if you don’t complete all tasks and this will help with the sleepless nights.

As for the to-do list, he suggests trying to complete it before noon (but again don’t stress if something comes up to keep that from happening). Giving yourself a noon deadline allows for those things that come up that you can’t control. It gives time in the afternoon to face the other things that the day will present. Meeting should be scheduled in the afternoon, and never on a Monday morning.

One final thing he suggested...plan your weekend on Monday. It gives you something to look forward to and a goal to work toward. We work for FEMA which means a lot of people are here from somewhere else. If you find yourself in that type of situation, find something to do that makes you happy. Our presenter joined a rowing club and he goes out on the weekends to row. I have another Co-worker who has been taking dance lessons and one who does yoga at a local gym.

Maybe one of these tips will help you. Me? I’m looking for my calendar that I bought at the beginning of the year that I haven’t been using. Time to start getting more organized.

I haven’t done this in a while...not sure why except that life gets in the way. I have been putting my views on Twitter and Facebook, and I have been trying to use Instagram more. I just find that I get lost in life and neglect the blog.

Since my last post, I have sold my house and moved to Austin. I think it was a good move. I’m doing better here than I was in Beaumont and that’s only a good thing.

Since I recently learned how to do threads on twitter, I’m not sure if a blog is necessary, but I’m still going to try to blog some. I guess I got out of the habit because of the circumstances I was in and probably from some depression that I was dealing with. So, if you want to read my blog and have never been here before, welcome! Look around and comment. Let me know what you think.

But know that I won’t deal with hate. I know how to remove anyone who lets hate take over.

Safety and Happiness

I have been sitting around my house for the last few months after resigning from my job. Searching for a job is a long arduous process that is frustrating and depleting. It feels like there will never be a place that fits me and will be my career. While I sit and search, I read a lot about what is going on in the world and man is it frustrating. I get angry so much that I can actually feel my blood pressure rising. Politics. Sports figures protesting. Adults threatening children. It is anger inducing. I would like to address all of these while taking a look at what the founding fathers wrote when putting the foundation on this great country. Yes, it is now and it always will be a great nation. I will get to that, too.

 Let's look at what the Declaration of Independence says.

When in the Course of human events it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

When Thomas Jefferson wrote these words, our fledgling nation was in the midst of a war with Britain in an attempt to gain the freedom from the tyrannical rule of the king.  The newly formed independent states had voted for independence and they needed an explanation of why they felt it was necessary.  So let's look at some of the words as they might apply to the events of today.  Let's start with the next section.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. — That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, — That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness.

The thing that stood out to me here is the part about government becoming destructive forcing the people to alter or abolish it so as to effect their safety and happiness. This is what is happening in this country right now. There are governments across this land that have destructive laws in place that are affecting the safety and happiness of certain groups of citizens.
When Colin Kaepernick chose to sit during the national anthem he was forcing the people to look at decisions by police chiefs and judges and juries that have affected the safety and happiness of young black men and women.  Black youth are systematically singled out as being a threat to police officers and as such have been injured, and in some instance killed for just being black.  Now you might say I am making this all about race and you're right.  It is about race.  It's about the superiority of the white man who thinks he is the ruler of black people in this country.  White privilege is on display around this country like was seen in the darkest days of the civil rights fight and the days of the Jim Crow south.

White politicians have made it okay to be hateful again.  People are encouraged to hurt others because they are of a different race or religion.  They have even been told their legal bills will be paid for them should they be arrested and charged and taken to trial.  But it's not okay.

Kaepernick started a dialogue that this country needs to have.  It is resonating with other athletes on the professional, collegiate, high school and even youth levels.  The Beaumont Bulls is one such league that has been vilified for allowing a team to take a knee during the national anthem...and the local media only gives the side of the ones who are hating against the kids.  Hating against the KIDS!

In an article in the New York Daily News, a parent whose son plays on the team said, "Our children are receiving death threats from people saying things like hang those monkeys, they should've died on 9/11, and they're going to kill each other anyway." Adults are saying these things about children. Adults. And our local news completely ignores it.  They talk about the people who disagree but don't show the threats that the kids received.

Another local team is in hot water after some players posted a very racially divisive meme on social media after playing another local team.  This is also described in the same article.  Who know what, if any, punishment they got from the school but they probably didn't get any from home because they had to learn that hate somewhere.

These are the things that black children and young adults have to deal with every day that white people don't have to.  A black man is seen as a threat and a white man is seen as hungry.  A black man is shot and killed.  A white man is taken to Burger King.  A black teenager holding a toy gun is killed on sight.  A white man who actually has a gun is talked to and reasoned with.

White privilege.

It's real people.

It's also part of the destructive government that has shirked its responsibility of justly, with the consent of the governed, protecting the unalienable right of life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.  It is a government that needs to be abolished and altered so a new government that will effect the safety and happiness can be formed.  That is what the protests are about.  That is why they sit and kneel.

That is why they should sit and kneel.  And that is what our military has fought for.  That is what our flag should stand for yet for some it doesn't.  For some, the flag is a symbol of oppression by the government that should be protecting the life, liberty and happiness of all its citizens.

Let us not forget the soldiers who returned from Vietnam who were made to feel like they were murders.  Let us not forget that the black soldiers returning from WWII where they had fought for people of other countries to be free yet they came home to the same oppression that they left.

They were not free.  They didn't see any changes in their own country.  Their country was still holding them back, telling them they couldn't sit at lunch counters or attend school with white children.  They were held to higher standards to vote, with some going so far as to ask black voters to recite the entire Constitution or they couldn't vote.  That's what they came home to.  And while they have much better circumstances today, they are still being systematically oppressed by local, state and federal government on a daily basis.

You may not agree with the way that Kaepernick and other athletes have chosen to protest, but they have the right because of the same military that fought for all of us.  They don't cherry pick who they fight to protect.  They don't make conditions.  They fight for the Constitution.  They fight for the Republic.  They fight for all of us.

Oh My Geez

Donald Trump is coming to Beaumont. That sentence just makes me sick. Why in the world do people still want to support this man? I just don't get it. I'm too tired to say more than that. Good night.

A Bunch of Whiney Babies

"While debates are meant to include tough questions and contrast candidates' visions and policies for the future of America, CNBC's moderators engaged in a series of 'gotcha' questions, petty and mean-spirited in tone, and designed to embarrass our candidates," RNC Chairman Reince Priebus said in a letter to NBC, canceling the network's partnership with the GOP debate in February.

What a bunch of whiney babies on the reTHUGlican ticket. Not one of them can answer a question. Not one of them has an economic plan. Not one of them can do anywhere near a good job of getting this country fully recovered from the mess Bush left behind as President Obama has done. 

They want to either cut or eliminate Social Security. They want to give HUGE tax breaks to the richest people in the country....which will not allow the government to collect the taxes needed to pay debts. A complete bunch of clowns in a clown car who have no idea how to get out of the car. 

A vote for any one of them is a vote against this country that so many of their supporters claim to love so much. 

Free to Speak My Mind

So for the last year I have worked somewhere that frowned upon my first amendment right to speak my mind. Towing the party line was all that was accepted. Speaking against the policies was seen as a reason to let me go. Did I do what I had to do to keep my job? You bet I did. But recently things have changed. I have a new job that should allow me to express my opinion without fear of being fired. So here I am, back on my blog just in time for the election cycle and ready to express my opinion about ALL of it. I hope you will come back to my blog and read and let us talk about the world and issues that matter. Be sure to use my social media icons as I post there often and wish to share with all of my followers (if I have any, LOL!) Welcome back!

Transitions Are Not Always Easy: Guest Post by Lara Neves

Watching your kids grow up is hard. As much as I adore celebrating birthdays with my children, a little part of me hates it. I hate seeing them grow older because I desperately miss their past selves. Sometimes, when I am watching family videos from several years ago my heart just aches to hold my babies again, or to see my adorable toddlers again, or even just to have them be six years old again! Man, this mommy business is difficult!

When my eldest daughter went to her first day of Kindergarten, I was a mess. How on earth was I going to hand my little 4-year-old (yes--FOUR--she didn't turn five until October) to someone else for the day? I stayed as strong as I could while getting her situated in her new classroom, but as soon as I got in the car, I bawled all the way home.

This year, that same daughter will be starting her first year of HIGH SCHOOL. I don't even know what my life has come to because I am definitely not old enough to be the mother of a high school freshman!

These kinds of big school transitions are especially difficult for parents because they are just as new for us as they are for our children. And let's not forget that these transitions are not usually easy for the kids, either, which gives mom and dad even more anxiety about the whole thing.

It doesn't have to be that way, though. Growing up is unfortunately necessary, and we can't keep our children little forever. We need to help them through these transitions as best we can without creating extra difficulty because it is hard for us. Here are a few things that have helped me:

Talk to Parents Who Have Already Been Through It

Part of the problem is that everything is so unknown, as I mentioned before. This year, my middle daughter will begin middle school. I am not nearly as angsty about this transition as I am about my eldest starting high school. Why? Because I know what to expect. Bria did not die from attending middle school, and so I am fairly confident that Chloe will not die, either.

If this is the first time you are navigating the educational transition as a parent, find other parents who have done it before. (Preferably parents whose children are attending the same schools yours are.) Ask them as many questions as you can think of. Seriously, dump all your worries on them--they'll be happy to answer because they know what it's like. It's nice to know what you and your child will be facing well ahead of time.

What are the teachers like? What is the homework policy? How does the busing system work? What are the extracurricular activities like? Etc.

Communicate With Your Child

Chances are that you aren't the only one with anxiety. Kids aren't sure what to expect during these transitions, either. Spend a good portion of the summer just talking with them and finding out what their concerns are. And then do your best to resolve those concerns.

My daughter was so worried about memorizing her locker combination and being able to even open her locker when she first went to middle school. Our solution was that we would go in a couple days before school started (in our district you are allowed to do that) and practice until she felt completely comfortable.

When my youngest daughter was just starting Kindergarten, she was very worried about taking the bus home by herself after lunch since Kindergarten was half-day and she wouldn't have her older sister with her. I called the school to find out the protocol and we discussed it every day for several weeks before school started. When the bus dropped her off that first day, she was a very triumphant 5-year-old because she had been prepared.



I have found that by working to alleviate my children's concerns, that my own are resolved in the process. Part of my worry is that my kid won't be able to unlock her locker or get home on the bus, so when I help her work through it, my own worries dissipate. It's kind of amazing.

Rely on Family Traditions--or Create New Ones!

Finally, I have found that when I work hard to make the beginning of the school year memorable for my kids, I don't have to think about all my worries as much. We have a few diehard traditions at our house for the beginning of the school year and they get the whole family excited about what could otherwise be a really anxious time.

Our favorite Back-to-School tradition is having our Back-to-School Feast the night before school starts. We introduce a family theme for the school year, have an amazing meal, and then do a fashion show where the girls model what they will wear on the first day.

The year Bria, my eldest, went into middle school I wanted to focus on that big transition with our family theme. So it was "I Can Do Hard Things." I loved the way she internalized it, as did my other two children. It helped me a lot that year, too. We can do hard things--and watching our kids grow up is hard, remember?



Last year, my youngest had recently had a diagnosis of Celiac so we focused our theme more on healthy eating:



If you don't already have Back-to-School traditions, it's never too late to start! Ice-cream for breakfast, special school supply/clothes shopping dates, fancy dinners--anything wonderful you can think of to help you and your child look forward to school starting.

Even though Bria is a lot older than she was when we first started our Back-to-School feasts, she still wants to wear the silly homemade crown I make for them. She loves it. It's something to cling to.

And it's something for me to cling to as well.

I'll just have to think of something really amazing for her next educational transition: College. Thankfully, I have four years to digest that information.

Here's to an amazing school year for the kids AND the parents!

Lara is the mother to three beautiful, brilliant and bossy daughters. She’s married to The Maestro, Orchestra Conductor extraordinaire. When she isn’t working on her mother of the year status, you can find her singing professionally, teaching voice lessons at the University, taking lots and lots of photographs, listening to opera, finding a good deal on groceries, or reading a good book. (that is, if she’s not blogging). She blogs at www.overstuffedlife.com, where she writes about parenting, home organization, photography, gluten-free living, and all of the other things that comprise her overstuffed life.

Okay or Not Okay?

I want you to watch this video before you read this post:

Now that you watched (you did, right?)....what do you think?  If you couldn't view the video...go to Outrage at ESPN.  Think about that while you read my take.

Here's my take:  I have three boys.  I have always told them that there is no reason in this world to ever hit a girl.  NONE!  That has always been my rule.  I don't believe that boys should put a hand on a girl...ever.  I found out recently that my ex had David convinced that it was against the law to ever hit a girl.  Well, it worked.  He believed his dad.  

But let me say this:  While I still do not think that a man should ever hit a woman because he thinks he can or because he thinks she did something to deserve it, I think a man should be able to defend himself just as a woman should be able to in the same situation.  If a woman is being abused and she decides enough is enough and strikes back, usually she is completely vindicated because the man is, well, a man and he was abusing her.  This is true even if she kills the man.  But...what if a man has been abused by a woman?

Yes, it happens.  If the man strikes back, would he then be vindicated or would he be put underneath the jail?  If a woman comes at a man because she is angry and she is railing on him, should the man just take it?  Should he just lay there and let her beat the crap out of him or should he stop her?  One hit that stops her?  Is that okay?  You can stop someone without beating the hell out of them....is that acceptable?  Or is it unacceptable for a man to defend himself in any situation? 

So what do you think?  Leave me a comment.  Let me know what you think about this subject.  I'm sure there are many opinions out there.

Let's Get to the Bottom of Things

Word around town is that tomorrow, there will be indictments handed down from the Jefferson County District Attorney's office and the special grand jury that was impaneled to investigate BISD. 

These indictments are said to be just the first in a line of indictments that are expected to be handed down by this grand jury.  The ones tomorrow are said to be complicit in not only fraud and collusion, but they are said to have had a hand in creating and hiding monies that belongs to BISD.  I have to say my curiosity is peaked.

Months ago, when the FBI first began its investigations and it came out that $4 million dollars had been embezzled, I heard a much larger number than that.  The number I heard was closer to $16 million dollars, maybe even more.  I also heard many other names than those who were eventually found to have taken the $4M...I can only think that some of those names may be indicted this week or indictments may be coming for them. 

All I really know is that this will not be complete if the investigations and indictments do not touch the right people.  If someone is left out because of connections, it will not bode well for the new DA.  He has shown himself to be ethical so far, so we expect great things from him. 

Word is also that there will be those in the Jefferson County Courthouse who will be affected by these indictments.  We all know that things have been going on down there that are less than ethical, so we hope that those persons will feel the wrath as well.

I don't have any concrete knowledge about any of this....this is just little things I am hearing and reading and I always keep an ear out because I care about Beaumont and BISD.  I just hope that now that the BOM is installed, things will soon be back on track.  Getting to the bottom of the problems will be a tremendous help and part of that includes making sure those responsible for the gross mismanagement are held accountable.

Big Brother...Yes I Watch!

So, every summer, I watch Big Brother...and every year there's that one person who is just a total annoyance.  This year, no one is really standing out as a that person...but Caleb is close.  This boy...I gotta tell ya...he's a little looney-toons.  He doesn't look like he's a little off....see:

He's cute.  He has massive tattoos, but I can deal with that.  But, man...he has lost his mind over another house guest, and it's getting into his game a little too much.  Caleb has fallen head over heels for Amber.....

Granted, she is gorgeous and smart, but there's one thing that is wrong with this situation...Amber doesn't like Caleb, much less have the kind of feelings for him that he has for her.  It is so sad to watch.  He keeps tabs on her in the house, like who she is with and if she's thinking about him.  Whenever anyone tries to talk game to him, he talks about Amber.  He agreed to be put on the block to save her, which he did by throwing the POV competition, and now he thinks she owes him in some way.  She didn't ask him to do that...he volunteered.

But he's stuck on her none the less.  The biggest hitch in his infatuation......

Cody.  Currently this week's HOH, Cody is Amber's best friend in the house.  FRIEND being the operative word.  They are friends...so they sit and talk and rub shoulders and cuddle...yeah, but still friends.  Caleb, just tonight, walked in to the HOH bedroom just so he could see if Cody and Amber were in there and what they were doing.  It was so obvious that's what he was doing because he walked in, sat down, stared at Cody and Amber, didn't say a word, and then got up and walked out.  The boy is obsessed.

He needs to go home. 

I may blog once a week or so about Big Brother now, so watch for the posts.  I will choose one person to blog about, so stayed tuned.  And leave me comments to let me know if you're watching and what you think!  I like comments!!  

 

I Am A Sucker...Yes I Am!

In this house, we are dog people.  This is because I am highly allergic to cats.  If I go to my sister's house I have to take Benadryl so that my eyes won't swell and itch and my sinuses won't get so stopped up that I cannot breathe.  I even had an allergy attack one night many years ago when I went out to the garage to retrieve a quilt that was in a storage box, but that apparently a cat had gotten into.  Now, mind you, I didn't know this at the time I brought it inside, took it to my bedroom, shook it out and put it very carefully over my bed.  Well that didn't last long: within minutes I was in the shower washing the dander out of my eyes and hair and trying to make sure it was gone and not going to cause me any further problems.

Why am I telling you this?  Because of this:

This little baby was walking down highway 105 one day.  If you know anything about 105, you know that big trucks travel this road all day long and they sometimes don't even stop for traffic signals - especially at 105 and Tram....which is very close to where said baby was running down the shoulder.  Being a sucker, I pulled over to the shoulder and backed up to a point where I could see the baby and told David to get out and catch it.  After trapping him in a ditch, I got a towel from the car and we put it over him and picked him up.  At that point we didn't know if he was too wild to keep or if he was flea infested or what.  We just knew he couldn't be left on the side of the road.

Fast forward a few weeks, and here we are:

 He sleeps on my desk.

 He sleeps on my pillow.

He even sleeps in a box on top of my printer.  He can sleep anywhere.

As for the resident baby of the house, Coal puppy, well he hasn't been too receptive to the invasion.  For the first week or two, he didn't even want to be near the kitty.  He did allow him to get close, though, and I have proof:

"Don't get any closer, Kitty.  I don't like you."

However, things have gotten to a point where Coal doesn't mind the kitty so much...even though Kitty bites his legs while he eats and slaps his ears with his claws out...and then there's this:

"Touching isn't so bad, now is it?"

Kitty will hopefully be going to live with Sheri (her of the cat filled house) at the end of the month.  Of course this is all dependent on the resident kitty at her house, Miss. Priss Butt, accepting this sweet baby. 

"We wear Christmas collars...can you deal with that, Kitty?"

Kitty's new name (I think) is Bruno Butt.  Yes I know...but if you're a cat living in casa de Sheri, you have Butt somewhere in your name.  It's a pre-requisite. 

How am I dealing with the intrusion?  Not so bad, actually.  Other than a few times when my eyes have gotten itchy after kitty has slept on my shoulder, my allergies have been in pretty good check.  I know that will change when he gets older.  I haven't ever had an issue with kittens, just cats.  He's a good kitty, but I think we will stay dog people around here...I mean after all, how can you not love this face?

 

Because I Can't Afford To

I read an article just this week about a mom who drove her Mercedes to pick up food stamps (actually WIC) and how she was looked at when people saw her drive up in that particular car.  The article was in the Washington Post and was titled "This is What Happened When I Drove My Mercedes to Pick Up Food Stamps."

This article hit home for me.  Why?  Well, I don't drive a Mercedes, but if I did own one and it was the car I needed to drive at that particular moment, it would be the car I would drive.  No, it hit home for me because I have been asked a question similar to one she was asked..."why don't you sell the car?"....but in my case, it's "why don't you sell your house?"

My answer to that question is simple:  Because I can't afford to sell my house. 

This mom was driving a car that was paid off that her husband had purchased before they were married and had twins and a home....and before her husband lost his job two weeks before she gave birth.   This car wasn't a slap in the face of those who drove up to that same church in cars that were maybe barely running or that were much older and much less extravagant as a Mercedes.  It was the car that was running that day.  It was the car she needed at that time. 

I was asked by a very good friend why I didn't just sell my house.  He asked me this as I was in the middle of yet another crisis at my house...no hot water because the water heater was leaking.  It costs money to fix things like hot water heaters and appliances and a/c unit, which right now I don't have the money to spend on such things.  So why don't I sell my house?  Why don't I just rid myself of the stress of worrying about broken appliances or water heaters or other such things that go wrong when you are a homeowner?

Because I can't afford to sell my house.

Right now, my mortgage payment is $770.95.  Yep.  That's what it is.  There are few three bedroom apartments in Beaumont, and even if I did want to move in to one, they rent for over $1000 a month.  My monthly child support is all we live on right now.  That's $1500 a month.  I can't afford to live anywhere except my house right now.  That's why I don't move. 

Not because I just want to stay in this house and deal with crises when they arise.  I stay in this house because I can't afford to sell it. 

Before you look at people who may be in the same situation as either me or the mom in this article, maybe stop to think that the situation isn't one we choose to be in...it's just what we do because we can't afford to do differently. 

On Being a Facebook Group Admin

As an admin on several Facebook groups, I have learned many things about being an admin that I would like to pass along to anyone who is going to start a Facebook group.  Many of the things are simple, but others are important to the integrity of the group.

How to deal with spammers
Facebook groups are a favorite place for spammers to try to get people hooked to their crap in a way that seems safe because, hey, we are part of the same group that is interested in doing good in our community so why would someone use this group to phish for gullible people?

So how do you deal with this?  First of all, if you are going to be the only admin, you need to be the only one to control who is added to the group.  This can be done in the settings.  Allowing anyone to approve adding people to the group gives control away and allows the group to become something you never intended it to be.  If you started the group, then you admin the group and only you approve who joins.

What should the settings be?
My rule of thumb is that my settings are as controlled as possible.  Depending on what the group is for, you may want to set it to secret - no one can even find the group if you don't tell them about it.   I used this for a neighborhood group (more on that later) that was just for people in our neighborhood so we could communicate.  There's also a setting that is private that allows anyone to see an entry page for the group, but they have to asked to be added, and the admin is the one who can approve.  This is useful for, say, class reunion groups.  Then there's the least restrictive setting that is open.  This setting allows anyone to see the group, who is in it, what people have posted...and this is the one that needs the control for who is approved for the group.  Unless the setting is changed, anyone can add and anyone can approve people in the group.  Just decide what the group is for and what the target audience is and you will know what settings are appropriate.

How do I know who not to let into the group?
This is the tricky part.

In an open group, you might want anyone to be able to join without restriction.  I admin a group for a youth sports league.  I don't want to restrict who can see what is happening with the league, so anything but open is not what I want.  I do, however, want to be the only one who is the admin so that if someone slips in that should not be there, I have the option to remove them from the group - this includes spammers.

How do I know they are spammers?  If you see that someone has posted something that looks like an ad, and you have no idea why that particular ad would be on the group page, then this is usually a spammer.  You can also tell if you go to that person's wall.  If this individual has just joined Facebook or doesn't have any friends...or isn't connected to anyone else in the group in any way, then this person is a spammer.  Go to the list of members, search for this person, and then block them.  You may have to do this over and over, but eventually it will be less and less often.

Now that I have a group, how much control do I actually have?
You have all the control.  Facebook links groups you created to your personal page.  This makes you responsible for everything posted on that group page.  Comments that can be construed as racist or pornographic can come back to you.

THIS IS IMPORTANT: You can delete anything you deem offensive or anything that is not appropriate for the group.  I know people will cry censorship, but you have the right to remove any inappropriate comments from any group you admin.  Some would say you have an obligation to do so.

I ran into this in the neighborhood group I started.  When I created the group, I intended it to be for all of my neighbors...even those with whom I had no desire to be friends.  That wasn't part of my intention.  I don't have to be friends with everyone to allow them to be part of something that is for a neighborhood.  I intended for the homeowners to be able to communicate with each other, and it worked really great at times...like when cars were being broken in to, or when the pool had to be closed for maintenance.  But there were times when some people decided to use the page to slander others and this was unacceptable.  Posts were deleted, and people cried foul....and it always happened to be the 30-something dead-beat son of a homeowner who was living off mom and dad because he is just a loser (my opinion, deal with it).  You have to deal with people like him, but you don't have to be bullied by them.  It is your group, your Facebook, and therefore, your right to censor if need be. 

Falling Down Around Me

I had a horrible day yesterday.  By the time I got in bed, I couldn't breathe and felt like the world was falling in around me. 

The day started off with me waking to find that the SCOTUS had ruled that a business can deny birth control as part of its insurance plan.  I had a day long debate about this on facebook with a friend of a friend.  I got into things about my personal life that he had no business knowing but that I felt were good examples of what he was arguing.  He argued that women just want birth control so they can go out and get laid all they want and be loose and not have to worry about getting pregnant.  (Can you say Rush Limbaugh influence?)  I took great offense to this.  He said he also didn't believe that insurance could pay for Viagra, yet he didn't answer me what his thoughts on that would be if someday he needed it.  He just didn't get it. 

He said that women should just go find another job if they work for say, Hobby Lobby, and disagree with the ruling.  I told him that women making $10/hr can't just change jobs if the job they have provides them insurance.  It just isn't that easy.  He said they should just pay for the birth control themselves then because $40/month really isn't that much to pay if it something you think you really need.  That's when I got to the point where I felt the world was falling down around me.

See, each month, my child support is $1500.  My ex doesn't trust me to make the mortgage payment so he makes that payment out of my child support.  After my mortgage payment is deducted, I am given $665 a month.  That money has to pay my electricity, water, phone, cable, and internet bills.  (No comments on my cable and internet.  It's all the entertainment we get, and the internet helps with job searches.) Those bills usually total around $650/month.  I don't even have money to feed my kids.  Our cars have no insurance.  Yesterday, my mom spent $240 on two tires for Nicholas' car....and since she has been buying our groceries, I don't know that I can ask her for more this week...and we only have one more night of food left in this house.

Now, since I have told you all of that, let's go back to the woman who is making $10/hour.  Before taxes, that's $1600 over four weeks....before taxes.  My mortgage is much lower than rent on just about every one bedroom apartment in Beaumont.  If this woman is offered insurance at her job, and that insurance will allow her to get birth control for $10/month, that's $120/year as opposed to the $480 a year if she has to pay for it herself.  What is she supposed to go without?  With the math at my house, there's already no food unless the electricity bill isn't paid, and then that will only get one week's worth of food...but then there's no electricity in the house.  So where does the cut need to be made?  See.  He just doesn't get it. 

Then on top of all of this, I sat in front of my television last night and watched a room full of people cheer when the BISD board of trustees did not approve the RIF that would have laid off 110 teachers.  This made me sick.  The state appointed conservator was appalled at what was happening in that room.  It's like no one understands that when the state comes in to take over that the cuts will be more broad and deeper than what the incompetent board members were suggesting.  I know that the feeling is let the BOM do the job because the BOT is not doing the RIF fairly, but really people?  This is not going to be pretty.  It is not going to be nice and sweet and the ones who will suffer the most (yes, more than those who are laid off) will be the students.  You all just cheered that the education of our students will be at much greater risk than if the RIF had been approved last night. 

I can't handle days like this.  Too much stress and too much ignorance. I need to get out of this town and I can't even escape for a day. 

.....and we still have a kitten.

Look!!! I Added Something New!

I learned how to add social networking icons to my page today...I am so proud of myself.

I also learned how to take a picture like this:

And make it transparent, like this:

May not seem like a big deal, but when working in Photoshop, it makes it easier to create things because there aren't white boxes around pictures.  It works no matter what color you are trying to get rid of in the background, so it's really good to know.

But now I am going to bed.  I am tired after having stayed up all night last night. 

A Little Something I Tried

(I totally stole this design, but used different fonts and stuff, but I still needed a template to go by...so here it is.)

I saw this invitation on Pinterest today.  So wait, if we are supposed to steal things from Pinterest, did I really steal it?  Anyway, I spent the majority of the day making this invitation.  I think it turned out pretty close to the one on Pinterest.  Nicholas said it did.

I want to show that I can do things like design invitations, or make banners, or pretty much whatever you want.  I have been doing stuff like this for a long time.  The invitation I did in Publisher with fonts I found online, and then I added the frame and the banner across it with photoshop elements.  I would love to get a job that utilizes this skill as I am pretty good at it.  It uses my grammar and spelling as well as my design skills with the desktop publishers.

You can see some of my Facebook covers and banners for my blog here.  I can design one for anyone with any theme.  They also work for Twitter.  If you're interested, let me know.  I will give you pricing if you ask.

Traffic is Up!

Since I started posting my blog to Twitter and Facebook, the page views on this blog have gone up exponentially.  In numbers, there were 200 page views last month.  Considering there were only 1200 posts over a year's time, I doubled my monthly readers!  I'm impressed.

I am going to start doing a little more here, like loading pictures and talking about more than BISD.  I hope I keep you interested.  If you like what you read, please leave a comment to let me know.  I like reading and responding to comments.  That's part of what makes a blog fun.

Thanks for reading!!  Come back often!!  

You Do Not Speak For Me

I sat here at home last night watching the disgrace that happened in the administration board room at BISD.  I clapped sometimes at comments made by the public...and then I wanted to vomit when the vote was taken to fire over 200 teachers. 

I sat here yelling at my screen when Zenobia Bush, in all her ignorance, made the following statement:

"I try to be respectful and listen to what you have to say, but the reason I asked how many of my constituents are here is because there are some of you who are under the false assumption that you represent all of Beaumont, Texas, and I'm sick of hearing it," she said. "There is more than just one side to a story.

"You cannot make me go home," she replied to vociferous booing, "and until a board of managers comes here, I am going to be sitting right here. I'm going to make the decisions that I make, and I'm going to go home and sleep well."

This woman is so ignorant of what is going on around her it blows my mind.  This is what I have to say to her:

Ms. Bush,

Respectfully, you don't speak for me.  You speak for the people of your district who elected you to that seat.  Those people are going to be the most affected by the decisions that you and the board made last night.  Your agreement that over 200 teachers be fired and that students be bused across town to a school was a blow to your constituents. 

You stated in one meeting something about "people who look like you" being disenfranchised by the 5-2 plan. Ma'am, with all due respect, the "people who look like you" disenfranchise themselves every time they do not go to the polls to cast a vote.  I have a friend who is a black man who told me once that black people do not go out to vote because they feel they are not being afforded the equal rights when they try to vote as white people.  Whose fault is that?  If a person over the age of 18 is registered to vote and that person decides not to go because they feel they will be turned away or their vote won't be counted, that is not the problem of the people who do vote.  Just because a plan was passed that you disagree with, you cannot blame it on us.  Why not go out and talk to the "people who look like you" and encourage them to go out and vote if you want a different result?  Why not get in your car and take the elderly in your district to the DPS office if they need an ID so they can vote?  Why not be proactive instead of being reactive when things do not turn out the way you want them to?  I get so tired of this argument from the black community.  The only people holding the black community back are the black community.  Fight for it if you think you are being disenfranchised.  Fight for it at the polls, not with money that doesn't belong to you but instead belongs to the students of BISD. 

I have been as respectful as I can be on this issue.  I have not attacked individuals, but the entire system that has gotten completely out of control.  It it time that the "people who look like you" start taking responsibility for what happens to them.  Were they at the meeting last night, maybe...maybe not.  If they truly supported you, why weren't they there to speak up for you?  They had the same opportunity to speak that others had and the same means of asking to speak.  No need to go to the admin building, applications were online; and, if they really wanted to speak and had no way to get there, I'm sure you would have helped them out....right? 

Your asking during the public comment portion of the meeting was not only an ignorant thing to do, it was inappropriate.  It doesn't matter in which district those in attendance live.  What matters is that those are the people who truly care about every student in BISD.  Not one of those people can say they are only fighting for the children of the district in which they live.  They will tell you that they are fighting for every child, every teacher who will be unemployed, and even for you...for your vote last night hurt all of Beaumont.  Those are the ones who have been out at admin every meeting making their voices heard...the problem is that you and the other four board members were not listening.  You have not been listening for the last three years.  You didn't listen last night.  You will, however, be listening soon when the commissioner asks you to vacate that seat that you cherish so much. 

What you do not seem to understand is that nothing matters in all of this except the students.  You also do not understand that at some point, you need to do what is right, not what you believe the people in your district want.  Have you asked them?  Have you gone out to see how they are being affected by your decisions?  If you haven't, you have failed them. You have failed the voters and you have failed their children.  Your inability to see that is what truly disturbs me.